Archive

2.26.2007

Maxwell's Silver Hammer: Muder with a Smile!

I like this song. Here The Beatles prove that a taboo subject like murder can be sung about tastefully, and happily. On this third track of Abbey Road we hear the heartwarming tale of Maxwell Edison, majoring in medicine, presumably in college and looking for love. So he calls Joan who's majoring in drug use and says "hallo bird, want to go see a picture oy?"
To which she replies "yes, I would like to see a R rated picture please". Later that night she rides in the auto over to Max's apartment, rings the doorbell and stands there for a while, then rings again, and still no reply. Despondent, yet slightly relieved, she turns to leave when suddenly the door swings open and...THWACK!!! A silver hammer crashes down upon her head, and then proceeds to hit her three more times to "make sure that she was dead".
Next day: Maxwell is being an assclown during one of his classes, the teacher gets quite cross with him for interupting her lecture and makes him stay afterwords. While he's at the board doing his Bart Simpson opening credit thing, the teacher gets distracted for a moment, here's the perfect opportunity for murder #2. So he creeps up behind the professor, pulls the silver hammer out of his pocket, which he apparently carries at all times, and hits her not one, not two, not three, but four times, upon the head.
Well, that was a huge mistake Max, cuz you hit her exactly four times, in the same spot, with the same weapon as you did poor Joan, a pattern is emerging and now it's just a matter of time before scotland yard closes in...And plus there were like two or three surveillence cameras in the room, yeah, you're probably gonna get the chair.
Next day: easy case, the judge has skipped the trial portion and gone straight to sentencing, he raises the gavel and begins to proclaim the verdict but Oh god! in a last ditch act of sheer defiance against all decency here comes Max again who's somehow gotten his silver hammer out of the evidence locker and slipped it past security, and is now rushing toward the judge's stand! Murder #3, right in front of a crowded courtroom. A nation is shocked...and stunned.
It was a good run, Max, I have to admit. But, you know, you're a serial killer and all, so, it doesn't look like you'll be in any more Beatles songs. Sorry buddy.

2.06.2007

LA POLICIA!


Update: July 2007...
o ya...there was a tour and I went
(St. Louis) ...
awwwesome show. The guys sounded fantastic and I can finally check this off my "things I must do or see or else I'll regret it forever" list. A couple of the highlights for me were "Driven to Tears", "So Lonely" and "Walking in Your Footsteps"... anyway it was all amazing! (even though I realized I left the tickets at home somewhere around Springfield). :/ I think I have a video clip of me freaking out somewhere. I might post it.

"ROXANNE IS A CROWD PLEASER" ~ CLIFF PLANTER













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Everybody
be sure to check out the Grammys this coming sunday, THE POLICE are reuniting and a lot of other legendary artists who will assuredly stand the test of the time will also be rocking the stage! Such as; Christina Aguilera, Beyoncé, Mary J. Blige, the Dixie Chicks, Gnarls Barkley, John Legend, Ludacris, John Mayer, Corinne Bailey Rae, Carrie Underwood and Justin Timberlake with the winner of the my grammy moment contest! Sweet.

And as an added treat, according to the grammy website...
"For the first time in GRAMMY history, international sensation and current nominee Shakira will perform"


YESsssss! So, Sting, Andy, Stuart, I know you guys read my blog, so please, do this...an Andy Summers medley! Someone to Talk to > Friends > Be My Girl - Sally > Darkness

Just wishful thinking but that would be gold. Then Sting can rip off his shirt and punch Justin Timberlake in the kidney.

and most importantly of all...there's rumors of a big tour possibly!