U2 - No Line on the Horizon

U2 has once again descended from the heavens to impart new material on the masses. No Line on the Horizon is their third album of the decade and we're all wondering...will they continue creeping down the path of recycling and re-imagining Where the Streets Have No Name and Staring at the Sun? Of course, nothing new there. But what we also have (thanks to the expensive trifecta of super-producers: Eno, Lanois and Lillywhite) is a slick arrangement of their various sounds over the years (sans the electronica influences of Pop) resulting in a more texturally varied album than they've had in quite a while. It's vibrant, compact, has semi-memorable tunes and (compared to the last few efforts, at least) attempts minor risks...which is often more than you can ask from a band of their progressing years. With the exception of Get on Your Boots (which functions more as sound trying to rape your ears) the songs featured here are generic-ly radio-friendly as usual, but surprisingly more discreet (not unlike Zooropa) and most of the time succeed at toeing the line without crossing into "trying too hard" territory (like much of Pop and the often forced glory of Atomic Bomb).
Understated as the positives are, however, the bad is contrastingly obvious as we're confronted with the glaring vocal problems. Lyrically this is probably the most abysmal effort we've gotten from Bono. Some of the songs (No Line, Breathe, Stand Up) have enough musical gusto and energy that the lyrical content can be disregarded, others not so much. Like Unknown Caller whose botchy, circular (but strangely hypnotic) lyrics sound like he’s singing from the point of view of a computer that has performed an illegal operation. And Boots which is like a modern remix of Escape Club's Wild Wild West. Too often the combination of delivery and content is disjointed as if unplanned, causing some songs to drift off course. And also, it doesn't help that Bono has essentially been living in an ivory tower for decades. At least on last few records he still had a finger on the general pulse of humanity and could distract us with a strong hook. Now he's just throwing vague biblical jargon and greeting card morality into a blender and then retreating back to his hot tubs and Ferrari's.
The vocal mix on this record only adds to the frustration in that Bono seems to have been pushed (or resigned) to the sidelines, as opposed to his usual front and center-of-the-message role. Whether it be a style choice or necessity due to his age it causes the record to lose much of his charismatic persona. Where Bono usually acts as the anchor in contrast to the airy melodic songs, and the pompous rock star who powers along heavier tunes, on this he comes across more as a simple narrator, and U2 loses their pomp.

Diagnosis: although not as catchy or melodically refined it still has just enough going for it to keep within a few paces of the last two albums. My advice, they need to quit. They need to stop while fans still remember all the awesomeness they've produced over the years, because people can turn on you quickly. One more album of this will be the death toll. Get out while you can, Bono.
Or, spend some years trying to get in touch with the "average Joe". Move into some dude's two bedroom squalor, bring along your acoustic guitar and leave the sunglasses at home.
But that won't happen. So, realistically, I think it'd help if he stopped trying to be the world's moral compass and just wrote more lyrics about putting on boots and suffering from vertigo.

Bonus>
The following sample tracklist is the kind of album that U2 would have to make in order for the drooling masses to turn in revolt;
1. This Will Get Played The on the Radio Regardless
2. War is Bad
3. The Edge Plays a Riff
4. Fart Noises
5. Stop Fighting Over Religion
6. Jesus Said Some Good Stuff
7. Brian Eno Did This One
8. Vague Morality Lesson #245356457
9. The Drummer is Never Happy to Be Here
10. I'm Bono (And I'm Better Than You)
11. Song That Still Kinda Sounds Like 'Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For'

Worst U2 Song Ever: Get On Your Boots
Observations: White as Snow sounds like a discarded track from Fiddler on the Roof. Bono desperately tries to be John Lennon on track 10.

6.5/10